Copyright 2004 Daily News, L.P.

Daily News (New York)
September 18, 2004 Saturday
SPORTS FINAL EDITION
SECTION: SPORTS; Pg. 51

LENGTH: 593 words

HEADLINE: CAN'T CAP THIS RIVALRY

BYLINE: BY FILIP BONDY

BODY:


There is something almost refreshingly naive about these Red Sox fans, who drive four hours south in the insane belief that they have the right to purchase a ticket, sit in the rain next to the vaunted Bleacher Creatures of Section 39, and get treated with respect.

Silly, silly people. One woman in a Boston cap actually lamented that she couldn't purchase alcohol in the bleachers. "You ought to be grateful, because you'd be dead if we could drink beer out here," Bad Mouth Larry informed her, performing a public service. Then Larry told me to punch a particularly annoying Red Sox fan in the neck, a command that was disobeyed.

These Boston fans came a long way, ignoring the taunts and the hurricanes. They were dressed in their red or blue or whatever color caps and jerseys they happen to be wearing this season.

It is important to note that this brazen invasion of B's is not indicative of some national trend. The fact is, the Yankees are selling many more caps than the Red Sox, and will continue to do so unless the Red Sox caps start coming with two free Yankee caps inside.

I did my homework before I came to the game. According to Neil Schwartz, director of marketing for SportScanINFO in West Palm Beach, the Yankees now account for 27% of all hat sales in Major League Baseball, while the Red Sox are a distant second at 12%. That's less than half, for Boston fans who can't count championships and still seem to think they have a rivalry with the Yanks.

The interlocking NY is more than a mind-set, it's manifest destiny. Yankee cap sales are 33.24% ahead of last year, in a slumping market. The Yankees sold well over 30,000 caps in retail outlets during a seven-day period ending with Labor Day weekend.

The three top-selling caps in any sport - authentic, replica, adjustable - were all Yankee caps, as were four of the top seven. Even the hideous pink Yankee cap sold 4,200 units during that week. The Red Sox authentic cap was fifth overall, behind the Tampa Bay Lightning Stanley Cup championship caps.

The Tampa Bay Lightning barely exists anymore, and still people would rather wear its caps.

It won't be long before the Red Sox and all other sports franchises are smothered and obliterated by the sheer volume of Yankee sportswear and paraphernalia. That won't bother any of the regulars in Section 39, who were forced again last night to dredge up old, reliable, nasty cheers that always seem to shock and offend those who lack the sophistication to enjoy bleacher irony.

"Schilling, your wife is ugly!" shouted Israeli Joe.

"Hit him in the head!" was the collective chant when Manny Ramirez stepped to the plate, and then again when Ramirez hit a fake home run in the first and took a fake trot around the bases.

Johnny Damon was told to cut his hair, and then Statman decided that Kevin Millar "is a complete moron."

"Nobody in Boston listens to country music," he said. "What's with that Cowboy Up nonsense?"

Statman, aka Steve Tipa of Flushing, had one wish last night, as he protected his precious scorecard from the rain: Just once, he wanted the Yankees to break out to an early lead against Boston, so that he wouldn't have to sweat out another tight contest.

"These games are too nerve-wracking," Statman said.

Instead, the Red Sox scored first and then the rain started and the whole affair got dragged out, miserably. You had to wonder why Yankee fans bother to sit through this garbage, just to get their shirts and pants and socks wet, when we all know how the season ends in Boston.

It ends badly, no matter what happens on Sept. 17th.

GRAPHIC: RON ANTONELLI DAILY NEWS Reminding Red Sox of their last world championship is a sign that never gets old for Yankee fans.

LOAD-DATE: September 19, 2004